Chapter Nineteen : Confess
I went upstairs. The abundant bed-chambers appeared unnecessary, considering Athereld lived alone in that house. I noticed the pastel blue, dotted night suit on the bed that Athereld had prepared for me.
I wondered if Athereld was expecting me to spend the night at his place. My cheeks turned red thinking about it. Was that even possible? My grandpa would never allow me to stay at night at Athereld's place, would he? I wondered.
I hesitated for a moment. However, the smell of butter-roasted meat from downstairs reached the sensory nerves of my nose, making my stomach growl.
****
I flatly stared at the panda-shaped slippers after taking a shower. I had always wanted a pair of them.
I changed into loose-fitting dotted pajamas. The shirt was slightly oversized for me.
"Cute," I mumbled, putting on the slippers.
I came downstairs shortly. Athereld had started preparing the dinner table. My eyes widened, staring at the dishes on the table.
How could Athereld prepare so much in such a short time? I wondered. Athereld came out of the kitchen. The rosy apron suited him more than I could ever imagine.
Athereld's face brightened up, noticing me. He placed the plate of rose sauce spaghetti on the table.
"You look cute," Athereld said calmly. Sweats had appeared on his pale forehead.
"Let me help you," I said in a tiny voice, hastily taking the other plates and helping him to set the table.
Athereld suddenly grabbed my wrist and said, "If you don't like anything, let me know."
I felt more comfortable dining with Athereld as I wasn't concerned about my table etiquette. Athereld was an outstanding cook.
"It's so tasty! No wonder you didn't want me to help you with the cooking," I said, shoving the food in my mouth like a chipmunk.
Athereld only smiled at me. He wasn't eating much as his eyes continued to swerve over me.
"Did you like Aphrodite today?" Athereld asked abruptly.
I stopped chewing on the food, staring at him, getting confused. I placed the fork on the table calmly. Indeed, my mind was at peace since I had stopped thinking about the encounter earlier with Caspian. But the uneasiness returned as Athereld mentioned Aphrodite again.
I didn't raise my eyes as I gazed at my plate as if something intriguing was happening to it.
"Aphrodite is pretty. She is delicate and likable. There's no reason for me not to like her," I answered in a tiny voice after a while.
"Bailey," Athereld called my name calmly. He lightly placed his hands on my chin, forcing me to meet his eyes. "Your wolf is surpassed. Hence, it is discernible that you can not recognize your mate. However, people tend to observe every tiny detail of the person who piques their interest. I can see through the changes in your eyes when you are with Caspian," Athereld said.
My muscles tensed at Athereld's words. I couldn't deny what Athereld had implied. I fell for Caspian on the day of our first encounter when his thugs captured me.
At first, I believed it was a mere attraction that would fade with time. Nevertheless, the heart-wrenching pain I felt by thinking of Caspian getting married to someone else contradicted my faith.
However, I remained silent as I didn't dare to acknowledge my feelings for Caspian in front of others yet.
"Bailey, do you like Caspian?" Athereld asked. I was startled by his question.
I couldn't answer as my grip tightened on the utensils I had placed earlier on the table. Athereld exhaled deeply.
"What will you do when your wolf awakens and reveals its mate?" Athereld questioned. "What if it's someone else? Will you hurt your mate for him?"
"You have misunderstood," I said, hastily getting up from my assigned place. "I don't like Caspian. It's not even long since we met each other. Besides, he is a mafia who mercilessly hurts people. Why would I like him?" I asked as if I was persuading myself.
I was aware my words didn't sound convincing at all. Yet, it was better than getting rejected. Caspian loved Aphrodite and was going to get married.
Perhaps, Aphrodite was his mate. Even if she wasn't, they were alphas having the privilege of selecting their mates. I didn't belong anywhere in Caspian's life. I had read enough fantasy novels containing werewolf rejections. However, I didn't wish to be one rejected wolf in my life, no matter how attractive it appeared in the books.
"I am full. I want to return to my house tonight, Doc," I said calmly. "It was already exhausting today."
I realized I hadn't broken the shell yet around Athereld. As I tended to return upstairs to change into my uniform, Athereld prevented me by grabbing my wrist tightly. The enormous strength I felt in his grip made me unable to move even an inch.
I stared at Athereld blankly. He shoved my body onto the table, in a glimpse, making the dishes spill all over it. My heart pounded on my ribcage so hard that I felt like the bones would break. I recalled the situation when Caspian did the same. However, was that more intense? I wondered.
"You can't lie to me," Athereld said in a low-pitched voice. I could feel his warm breath all over my face as he leaned close to me.
"Is this a hobby of you two to pin people wherever you wish?" I calmly asked, staring into Athereld's eyes.
I was already tired of getting pinned by men. It would make me feel weak.
"Do you despise my touch?" Athereld asked, gently caressing my face with one hand when the other continued to pin my wrists dishonestly.
"Will you stop if I say yes?" I questioned, almost cringing. I didn't wish for it to sound so intense. It rang so wrong in my ears.
"I haven't even done anything yet," Athereld answered flatly.
I could hear Athereld's heartbeat as if he was more nervous than I was. I felt like Athereld wanted to say a lot of things. Hence, I didn't resist him.
"Do you wish to confess something?" I asked calmly. My heartbeat had become steadier.
Athereld bit his lower lip as his grip tightened around my wrist. His body on top of me pressed me hard on the table. For a moment, it felt like he trembled.
"Caspian and I were best friends and rivals. The alpha lord raised us together. Growing up, Caspian and I promised each other a conclave to determine the next alpha on the throne. However, the alpha lord always had a liking for Caspian more than anyone. Hence, it was comprehensible that Caspian would become the next alpha lord, though both of us possessed alpha wolves. Therefore, I lost my zeal to fight Caspian. As you can see, I chose to be a medic to avoid involving myself in any fight," Athereld paused after saying.
"Is this why Caspian is always rude to you? Because you gave up even before putting on a fight?'' I questioned.
"It wasn't the sole reason I gave up," Athereld answered in a tiny voice. He stared into my eyes, and I suddenly felt a chill down my spine.
Was his eyes always this cold? I wondered.
"I had always wanted him to be the alpha lord. I couldn't fight him anyway. After all, he meant everything to me," Athereld confessed.