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Chapter 7

  Before I run my fingers across the books, I notice that there is a notebook specially kept. This notebook has a leather cover and looks different from other items in this room. I do not know why, but I can sense that it is a precious thing for its owner and it is well-kept.    I really want to open it. Maybe because I am a human, a curious human. But my fear controls me not to open the notebook. Otherwise, I will be killed by Mr. Barnett, the owner of the notebook.   I take a deep breath and carefully move the notebook away from the book I want to pick. But to my surprise, something falls out of the notebook and drops onto the floor. I bend over to pick it up. It is a photo.    I close my eyes subconsciously hoping that not seeing it carefully can save my life. My heart jumps rapidly. A voice in my heart tells me that I should not stay in this room and continue reading the notebook anymore, but I still need to open my eyes to walk out anyway.   I open my eyes wide in fear and put the photo back into the notebook carefully.   ...   Two hours later, I walked out of the study. Amy lets out a sigh of relief. "Look, I have told you that Mr. Barnett would not be back so soon, right?"   I feel complicated. It seems that I have found his secret. Now I really hope that I did not go into his study or open his notebook.   "Amy, is there a monitor in his study?"   Amy says, "There is one outside the study."    My face gets pale immediately. "Then he will definitely know that I have been to his Study."   Amy comforts me, "After he comes back, you take the initiative and tell him about it. I have checked the time. You have only used it for two hours and they are all for your homework. He should not be angry."   Suddenly, my phone rings. I pick up the phone and see a message from my teacher. She has praised me for my paper. Her compliment eliminates my panic. I tell myself that I was not using his study deliberately and in terms of his secret, it was only an accident.   When he comes back, if I explain to him, he will not be angry. Maybe...   After all, I have agreed to divorce with him. After the divorce, we will not meet again. No matter how many secrets he has, it is none of my business.   After lunch, I go back to my room and close the door. I sit in front of the dressing mirror and lower my head to look at my belly. I say to myself, "Baby, I am reluctant to kill you too. But if I give birth to you, you will lead a more miserable life than me..."   I do not know if it is because of the pregnancy, not long later I sleep on the dressing table.   In the afternoon, I hear people walking hard outside my door. I wake up immediately. But before I come back to my senses, the door to my room has been opened.   "Mrs. Barnett, have you touched anything in Mr. Barnett's study?" Amy looks scared.   I feel afraid and stammer immediately. "Has. ..Has. ..Has he come back? Has he discovered?"   Amy looks anxious. "So you really did. You told me you were just using the library for homework. Then why did you touch on other things in the Study? Mr. Barnett is in a rage now. Mrs. Barnett, this time I really can not help you anymore."   I feel nervous and scared. My heart beats loudly. I only have one thought in my mind. I do not need to divorce him because he will kill me directly.   I start to cry. "Amy, I am sorry. I did not read his stuff on purpose. I was just moving the notebook and the photo dropped out. I did not do it on purpose. I put the photo into the notebook at once. I have only glanced at it. I did not even look carefully..."   Amy purses her lips. "I believe you but I can not help you anymore. Mr. Barnett just blamed me. Maybe I will lose my job."   I feel terrible. I can be punished but I can not let Amy suffer for me.   I run out of my room and I am about to explain to Freddy to save Amy when the lift opens slowly and Freddy comes out with a bodyguard pulling him.   His face looks gloomy and in his eyes, I can clearly see the boiling rage.   I know he would be angry but I did not expect him to be so angry.   "Freddy, I am sorry. I needed to write a paper this morning, so I used your library. This has nothing to do with Amy. Amy stopped me at first but I did not listen to her." I am nervous and there seems to be something blocking my throat.   I try to shoulder all the responsibility.    He stops in the living room and looks at me coldly. his eyes look red. It seems that I have irritated him badly. I open my mouth again. "I am sorry."   "You have seen it, right?" His voice sounds deep and chilly. His two hands are crossed. He looks relaxed but I can not see his fingers clenched hard. I think if he were not in the wheelchair, he would knock my head down."   "You stupid woman. How dare you? Do you think that you are the mistress of this house? How dare you go to my study and touch my stuff? Damn it!"   I tremble and shake my head. "I can not remember it clearly now. I only glanced at it. It dropped out, so I glanced at it. I did not do it on purpose. I do not want to know about your secrets. We will soon have no relations. You know it, right? I was only too nervous..."   "Shut up!" It seems that he hates me even more. "Go back to your own room. Before the divorce, do not ever walk out!"   I stop the exclamation I was about to say and I walk back to my room. I can clearly sense his distaste towards me."   Before I close the door, I hear Freddy say, "Amy, do not give her any food."   Is he going to imprison me and starve me to death?   Amy looks sorry for me, but she does not say anything now. In this house, Freddy is the law.

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