Chapter 12 : Fix It!

*Circe* Circe sat in the backyard moping and worrying about things. She wished so badly she could go back and change what she had done. She stood up and started to walk in large circles around the grassy area. So many thoughts were rambling on in Circe's mind. So many troubles. She tried to imagine a solution that wouldn't completely drive Samuel away. She could think of nothing. Circe glanced around momentarily before letting the tears fall freely down her face. She cursed her past self for being so rash and impulsive. "What am I going to do?" Circe found herself muttering out loud. "How could I have been so stupid and messed things up so badly?" Circe groaned and grunted in her panic, angry with herself most of all. "Maybe I should tell Henry," she thought. She knew he was desperate to be with Mae again. She no longer cared if he stayed mad at her as long as she could be with Samuel. "Maybe you should tell Henry what?" Circe's head snapped quickly in the direction of the question. She had been so focused on her fear and frustration, that she hadn't noticed Ivy walking amongst the rose bushes. "What are you so upset about, Circe?" Ivy asked again in a suspicious tone. Circe's throat went dry again, and she forced a hard swallow. Levi's wife had snuck up on her–Circe never even heard the tiny, dark-haired woman coming. "I'm… you know, just frustrated like everyone else.... It's a - it's a difficult situation." Circe started to try to walk away, but Ivy pulled her back. "You're a terrible liar, Circe," Ivy replied, turning Circe around to look at her. Circe felt a bit like she could cry. It was bad enough when she was dealing with this alone, but now she was caught. There was no way she could avoid telling people now. Ivy wouldn't let her keep this secret. "I don't know what you're talking about," Circe mumbled, doing her best to keep her eyes away from Ivy's. "I am not deaf, Circe! I know what I heard. You have acted strangely since the mating ritual like you knew something no one else did. While everyone else has been on the edge of war, broken-hearted and moping around, you've looked almost smug. You've been way too pushy toward Henry about having a wedding, even though you know how much pain he's in. Almost like you're rushing it. Are you trying to trap him before anyone finds out what you've done?" Ivy asked. Her voice was even and curious as opposed to the accusatory tone Circe expected, but Ivy's eyes were narrow and sharp. "I haven't done anything," Circe lied. She fought back the tears that were pressed against the back of her eyes. Ivy pursed her lips and nodded. "Here's the thing, Circe. I don't really like you at all, I don't like the idea of you being with Henry. But I don't think you're a bad person. Do me a favor and prove it, or I'll drag you back inside and force it out of you in front of everyone." Ivy crossed her arms over her chest, and her expression turned dark. Despite Levi being the jokester of the Mountain Pack, constantly keeping everyone entertained, it didn't take long for Circe to realize that Ivy had no sense of humor. She was always serious. Circe tried to think, to think of any reason or excuse she could give Ivy. She felt at a loss. She couldn't find any solution other than to tell the truth. Better it be just to Ivy than Henry and his father… or Samuel. Finally, Circe stopped fighting the tears and let them fall freely from her face. She glanced around, careful this time to make sure no one else was listening. She pulled Ivy farther away from the house and sat her down in the bushes by the old oak tree. "Alright, here's the truth. I love Henry, I've always loved Henry. For a long time, I thought there was nothing I wanted more than to be his wife. But he never showed any interest in me, even before he met Mae. But of course, once he did, it was all over for everyone else. Their love was truly written in the stars," Circed started, scoffing at the annoying perfection of the love she witnessed between Henry and Mae. "I felt desperate and panicked. It was almost time for the mating ritual, and I was ready to mate, but I still hadn't met anyone I wanted or loved more than Henry. I couldn't stand the idea of being alone and watching him live happily ever after with Mae… so I… um, I...." "You what Circe? Tell me what you did," Ivy encouraged in a flat tone. She showed no sympathy for what Circe was feeling, but she didn't seem very harshly judgmental either. Circe blurted it all out before she could think about it long enough to change her mind. "I went to the witch in the mountains, and I asked her to cast a spell. I asked her to make sure that Henry would be my mate and not Mae's. I can't guarantee it, but I'm certain if I hadn't had her cast the spell they would have mated." The tears fell harder now as Circe thought back to what she had done. The full weight of her choice bared down on her now, and the feelings of shame, guilt, and sorrow were overwhelming. She was crying so hard she found it difficult to breathe. She leaned a hand against the grass as she gasped for air through her sobs. "What then?" Ivy demanded. "Clearly something else happened, or you wouldn't be so upset. Your spell worked, and you got what you wanted, damned everyone else." Circe looked up in time to see Ivy roll her eyes. Now she seemed a bit judgmental, though Circe truly couldn't blame her. She realized now how foolishly and selfishly she had behaved. Circe did her best to control herself and keep her sobs from interrupting her speech. Ivy sat patiently waiting for Circe to continue. "Mae came by earlier to talk to Henry, and she brought her cousin, Samuel. I think he was supposed to be a peaceful negotiator, but Alpha Frederick isn't here. I knew… I knew the moment I looked at him that he is the one. He is my mate and the one I should be with. I can't stand the thought of not being with him now. I don't know what to do. I've just made a mess and ruined everything." Circe dropped her face into her hands and did nothing now to stop her sobs and heaving. She felt embarrassed and ashamed, and mostly, so desperate for Samuel. Ivy chuckled a little, causing Circe to look up from her despair. "Are you… laughing at me?" Circe demanded. She knew she had no right to be angry. She was the villain in this situation. She had caused all these issues between the packs. But she couldn't help feeling a bit offended. How could Ivy so carelessly laugh at her pain? Did she not deserve some sympathy? "Well, not at you, specifically, just at the irony of the situation. You screwed Henry and Mae, and Nathan, actually, with whoever his mate should truly be by doing this. You were fine with that and fine leading the packs into a war that might destroy everyone as long as you got what you wanted. It was only when you wanted something else–or rather someone else–that you realized the error of your ways and wanted to fix things. It's kind of pitiful. You're like a child," Ivy answered. Her words hit Circe like a knife. She knew everything Ivy had said was true, but it didn't make it feel better to hear. She certainly didn't appreciate being called a child. Circe narrowed her eyes at Ivy and did her best to straighten her upper lip. "I'm not a child," Circe barked in the most forceful tone she could muster. Ivy raised an eyebrow at her and shrugged. "If you say so," Ivy replied. Circe took a deep breath and tried to straighten herself up to seem less like the pitiful mess she knew she was. "Here's the thing though, Circe. You need to fix this." "I know, I know, but I'm afraid," Circe admitted in a meek voice. "Now you're afraid? Afraid of what?" Ivy questioned. Her sharp eyes stayed focused on Circe. Ivy's eyes felt like a bright light and a microscope viewing every mistake in Circe's life. "Raveena for one. I'm afraid she might not be willing or the cost to reverse it will be too great. But mostly I'm afraid...." Circe's voice trailed off. It was too painful to imagine Samuel never forgiving her or never being with him. "Oh, I see. You're afraid once Samuel finds out what you've done that reversing it won't be enough. That he'll decide he doesn't want you, and you'll still end up alone." Each word Ivy spoke felt like a new slice through Circe's heart. The shame felt like it was crushing her now. Circe nodded and kept her eyes on the ground. It was one thing for her to feel like a failure, for her to feel the shame of her mistakes only in her own head, but it was another to have her faults pointed out so plainly by Ivy. Circe felt like her throat was closing in. She felt a little lightheaded, and her vision was darkening. The pressure and pain of everything that she had done felt like it was crashing down on her. "This is quite a spot you've got yourself into," Ivy added. "Such a difficult and tricky situation. I can understand your fear. Both of the witch and Samuel. I don't envy you with the choices that you have to make now. But if you leave things as they are, you'll never have an opportunity to be with Samuel. You're right, he might not forgive you. He might not wanna be with you after he learns the truth. But if you do nothing, you'll never know, and you'll never have the opportunity to be with him. You don't really have a choice with this, Circe. Your only choice is to reverse what you've done and face the consequences that are coming to you." Circe stared at the ground, soaking in Ivy's words. She knew they were true, and the panic inside her only grew stronger with each truth Ivy uttered. "I will cover for you here. I'll give you an excuse so that nobody questions where you're going. There's no reason for them to know more than they have to right now. Go to the witch, and fix this. Because if you don't, I'll have no choice but to tell everyone the truth," Ivy added. There was a sense of threat and finality in her voice that sent a shiver down Circe's spine.