34. Whispers in the Night
After indulging in a lengthy pub rendezvous, I bravely set out to stroll my car back to its cozy garage. However, I was wobbling like a Jenga tower in a windstorm, and the night was darker than a black cat in a coal mine. Out of the shadows, a mysterious silhouette materialized, and just as I was about to unleash my inner Frankenstein, he seized my leg and pinned me against my trusty car, barricading my escape.
This fellow was more robust than a bull on protein shakes, and he screamed "werewolf" louder than a howling choir. But, right before I could unleash a scream of my own or devise an elaborate body part art project, he chimed in with, "Woah, how much fairy dust did you have, munchkin?" And that's when I recognized the voice – it was none other than Jacob.
My fuming reached epic levels as I realized it was Jacob, who had mysteriously disappeared for three whole days, as if he'd been on an intergalactic adventure with E.T. I folded my arms and snapped, "What do you want? You final

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