CHAPTER 3 A Night of Shock and Confusion

I had high hopes that this day would be etched in my memory as a special one, a day filled with joy and sweet moments. But, as it turns out, it's indeed a memorable day, just not in the way I had envisioned. Instead of being filled with sweetness and delight, it's been tinged with bitterness and disappointment, a far cry from the happy memories I had been wanting to have. I never thought I would leave the restaurant in a such state of shock, with my mind filled with questions and bitter emotions. I didn't know the dinner would be a blur, with Jason and Rachel's laughter and conversation feeling like a distant hum in the background. Heck, i didn't even know Rachel would be there. I didn't planned to be forced to smile and pretended to be happy, while inside, I was dying. Suffocating in pain, like a weight crushing my heart. I did not I would drive home with the cool night air doing just a little to calm my racing thoughts. I felt like I had been punched in the gut, my heart is aching with a mix of shock, anger, and hurt. The questions swirling in my mind were endless. Why did Jason ask me to dress up and meet him there, only to introduce me to the woman he loved? Did our friendship mean nothing to him? Was I just a pawn in some silly game he was playing? I felt like a fool, used and confused. Our friendship, once so pure and true, now seemed tainted and uncertain. I didn't know what to do or how to process my emotions. I felt like I was drowning in a sea of uncertainty, with no lifeline in sight. I stood up from my bed and paced around my room, I avoided the window, I do not want to catch a glimpse of Jason's house let alone, his room, as I always did. Instead, I collapsed onto the couch, feeling like I was sinking into a hell of despair. My mind was racing, my thoughts a jumbled mess of emotions. Should I talk to Jason about how I feel? Or would that ruin our friendship forever? I needed advice, someone to talk to who could help me make sense of this mess. And there was only one person I could turn to - Samantha. I reached for my phone and dialed her number, hoping she would answer and provide all the answers I so desperately needed. "Hey, girl! What's up?" she asked, her tone was light and carefree. Her voice was cheerful and felt like a balm to my soul, but it couldn't soothe the pain I was feeling. I took a deep breath, trying to find the words to explain my situation. "Sam...I need your help. It's about Jason..." I began, my voice trembling. "What about Jason?" she asked. Her tone changed to one of concern. I hesitated. I didn’t know how to continue "I don't know if I can talk about it over the phone. Can you come over?" "Lily, are you crying?" she asked in a soft and gentle tone. I nodded, even though she couldn't see me. "Yes, I'm crying. I feel like my heart is breaking." "Girl, talk to me, is everything okay?" she asked in an urgent tone. I took another deep breath, trying to find the words to explain my situation. "It's just...Jason introduced me to his girlfriend tonight. And I feel like a fool. I thought...I thought we had something special." "Okay, I'm coming right away," she said, her voice firm and reassuring. I nodded again, feeling a small sense of relief. Maybe, just maybe, Samantha could help me make sense of this mess. Maybe she could help me find a way to heal my broken heart. As I waited for her to arrive, I couldn't help but think about the events of the evening. I had been so blind, so foolish. I had thought that Jason and I had a connection, a special bond that went beyond friendship. But now, I realized that I was just a pawn in his game, a game I didn't even know I was playing. I was still lost in my thoughts when my phone rang, piercing the silence of my room. I looked at the screen and it was Sam calling "Hey, girl," she said, her voice warm and comforting. "I'm so sorry, but I couldn't get a ride to your place tonight. But don't worry, I'll be there first thing in the morning, okay?" I felt a pang of disappointment, but I tried to hide it. "Yeah, okay. Thanks, Sam." "I know you're going through a tough time right now, but I want you to try to be strong and calm, at least until I get there, okay? We'll get through this together, I promise." "Yeah, I'll try." "Good. And Lily? Don't beat yourself up over this, okay? You didn't do anything wrong. It’s okay for you to wanted to explore a deeper connection with Jason" I felt a lump form in my throat as I tried to hold back tears. "Thanks, Sam. That means a lot coming from you." "Anytime. Now try to get some rest, and I'll see you in the morning." I nodded again, and we said our goodbyes before hanging up. I felt a sense of relief for a moment but as I lay back on my bed, the weight of the evening's events came crashing down on me again. I thought about Jason and Rachel, and how they had looked so happy together. I thought about how I had felt, like a fool, standing there in my dress, thinking that I was special to him. And I thought about how he had introduced me to his girlfriend, like I was just a friend, nothing more. Well, truly, nothing more but common, there could be something more. Can he not see it? The tears I had been holding back finally broke free, streaming down my face as I sobbed uncontrollably. I felt like my heart was breaking all over again. I cried myself to bed, the tears soaking my pillow as I lay there, feeling lost and alone. I can’t to pour everything for Samantha when she comes in the morning, but right now, I just felt like I was drowning in my own sorrow. As I drifted off to sleep, I couldn't help but wonder what the future held. Would I ever be able to move on from this heartbreak? Would I ever be able to trust anyone again? How will Jason feel if finds out that I am not at all happy that he found a love It was in these thoughts and wet cheeks that I fell asleep.