Chapter 30

It's been weeks and we haven't found anything. It's almost as if Cadmer never existed. I never thought he'd be so hard to track or find. It's past midnight and I'm lying in bed unable to sleep as Xavier is still downstairs in his office trying desperately to find any sort of lead on Cadmer. He barely sleeps these days but then again so do I. The only difference is he chooses to not sleep whereas I-I am terrified to fall asleep. Every time I close my eyes I get sucked into my very own hell. Nightmares filled with Cadmers face and his smile burning into my brain. I'll feel the darkness closing in on me and it feels like I'm drowning, suffocating unable to get out and I'll scream and then it's over because before the second scream can leave me Xavier always manages to get there in time. He'll hold me and tell me he's there and that I'm safe and I'll fall asleep peacefully this time in his arms and he'll lay with me and fall asleep himself. It's turned almost into a routi