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His Extra-fast Swimmers

Since Rainey wanted to play the bigger person, I was happy to oblige. So I didn’t apologise. I just smiled at the crowd. They were in for a treat. I turned around, set down the empty glass and picked up another full one. ‘You’re right,’ I said breezily. ‘I’m really under a lot of stress, and I hear this is a great way to relax.’ I flashed a smile at Rainey. ‘So, if you don’t mind, I’m going to pour another one.’ I raised my hand and tilted the glass, watching the rich red liquid descend over her face like a mini-waterfall. The onlookers gasped. The Kleenex had been wasted. Rainey’s face was redder than the ripest Honeycrisp apples. Part of it was the wine. The other part was, I hoped, rage. It was immensely satisfying to watch. Shannon’s gape-mouthed look was the cherry on top. Then my mother gave me her second slap of the day. ‘Stop it!’ she shrieked. ‘What are you doing? What would your father think if he knew you’re acting like a lunatic?’ I would have let it go if she just slapped

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