Chapter 19
♡ Magee’s POV ♡
I looked at her with joy, for she had given me another chance to turn over a new leaf. I really want to jump up and down. But I didn't want to make a fool of myself in front of her, so I decided to smile like a jerk.
I know I screwed her up. I treated her like she was inferior to me and unworthy of anyone's love. If only I could take back all the terrible words, but the damage has been done and there's nothing I can do about it.
She looked at me with her beautiful Finger eyes, and I really wanted to kiss her soft pout, but I restrained myself from doing so, not wanting to scare her enough to make her escape too quickly. Lauren is the most beautiful girl I've ever seen. I probably lied to her and said I just wanted to be friends.
I never wanted to be friends with Lauren. I wanted more. I want her to be mine and mine alone. I've had a crush on her since the first day I met her, but mom and those hateful friends have ruined my hopes of being with her. Mom told me to stay away from her. The boys laughed at me for playing with the maid's daughter. I took my anger out on Lauren. I just couldn't stop my feelings for her, even though I would bully her and make her feel like shit. It's my sick way of saying I like her.
I would call her names and have my friends call her names. When I call her disgusting, they listen to me. But none of this nonsense is true. I just don't want other men to see her in any romantic way because she's my only partner. If I can't have her, then no one else can.
But I screwed up. I don't think she sees me that way. She did moan when I touched her. I feel a little happy. I really want to touch her again. She reacts so quickly that I don't know what she'll be like when I finally make love to her. Does she react to other men she sleeps with? It makes me angry to think about it.
I want to be the only guy she's ever slept with. But when I went on one-night stands with girls, I kept seeing different guys coming out of her dorm room. One time I got really angry and had a big fight with one of them. I can't stop thinking about him touching my girl with disgusting fingers, something I should have done.
I know you think I'm a hypocrite because I've slept with a lot of girls, but think about it, I'm someone who gets sexually upset every time I see Lauren. What else could I do when they were willing to have sex with me, but the only girl I really wanted to have sex with was looking at me with the hatred I had caused.
When I wanted her, I couldn't. So I kept bullying her and pushing her away. I hate doing this to her, and I just want to protect her. For a few days, I couldn't talk to her like a normal person.
Every girlfriend I've ever been with has blonde hair like hers, but I've never found Finger eyes like hers. I felt guilty when I flirted with Polly at the door of my flat because I knew she was there watching us, but I wanted to hurt her as much as she had hurt me that night when I saw the guy coming out of the dormitory.
Little did she know that when I made love to Polly, all I could think about was her, her legs wrapped around me as I drove the pole into her. All the girls I've slept with remind me of Lauren, and I imagine them as her.
Polly was my on-off girlfriend and I didn't want to be with her, but my parents forced us to be together. As for the contract with her parents, I don't care. I've never been interested in Polly, the only person who caught my interest was the girl sitting next to me, and I couldn't take my eyes off her.
But I can't let anyone see us as friends, or just at school. My parents will find out because I know they told that bitch Polly to watch out for me and I'm pretty sure she's not the only one. My fucking parents have people everywhere. The project came along at the right time, so if we hang out, they won't suspect anything. I really want to thank Lady Judith later.
"You know, just because we're friends now doesn't mean you get to stare at me like a creep.” She said, "Got me out of my trance.”
"Then I can't stare at you? "I asked, smiling at her blush at my words. She's so cute.
She looked away in embarrassment.” You're annoying, Magee.” God, I was shocked to hear my name out of her mouth.
She stood up, brushed herself off, and limped away from me. I stood up and laughed at her childishness.
"Wait, Lauren, you're going in the wrong direction.” I told her.
"I knew it! She mumbled awkwardly.
I laughed in her face and looked at her with my eyebrows raised.
"I'm fucking cold, can we go back? "'she cried gloomily. Some people are moody.
I nodded, smiling silently at her open irritation.” Sure, follow me.” I motioned for her to follow. She walked in front of me, murmuring incoherently.
"Lauren, your body is fucking sexy.” I said, laughing, and stood a few feet away from her so she wouldn't hit me. It's true, my girl has the sexiest body I've ever seen and she has curves in all the right places.
"Shut up, Magee! ” She cried, and I could imagine her blushing, she should look innocent.