chapter 13

I fall silent as I pull on the last item from the pile, gritting my teeth at his pigheaded denseness, as that ember erupts into a little flame, pushing my nerves taut. A small candle-sized one that hits in the dark recess and instantly glows and grows to epic proportions of a robust flame that moves me to dress faster with a hostile last tug to secure my pants. My blood boiling as it overtakes me, and I sweep my hair back with sass and grab the door handle angrily. Yanking the door open, surprised to come face to face with him as he s leaning his forehead against the door and I almost headbutt him full on. His eyes glowing with the turmoil of his emotions, but it does little to dampen mine. It only clicks my inner fury up another notch. They meet mine and lock on in that special way we have whenever our eyes connect, the sizzle, the connection, but he isn t expecting the response that comes out of me. Nor the rage. That little burning flame of crazy that explodes at the sight of him. "You didn t even like me before that night! You didn t know me! This, us, it s not real. It s something implanted inside of us by something up there." I point skyward, aggressively glaring at him. "We would never have fallen for each other, never have crossed paths, in any kind of way, if it wasn t for the Fates. I wasn t on your radar, and to be honest, I didn t like you either." I shove him back out of my space with a push to his abs so he clears the doorway, and he just gawps at me like I ve lost my mind. Maybe I have! "You don t even remember me do you, before that night? I didn t think so! You need to pull your head out of your ass and remember that. Carmen was the woman you loved and planned a life with, and you chose her—loud and painfully clear! You said the words to me, and this is done. The Fates didn t stop us, Colton, you did, and your family, and everyone else in this hellhole that confined my kind to a dark hole on the outskirts and left us there to die. So don t you dare tell me how awful this is for you because you have no fucking idea what awful is until you ve walked in my shoes for the last ten years. You have Carmen, you have a pack, a home, and a fucking choice in all of this. I never did! The Fates didn t punish you with this. They probably expected you to man up and do what they told you to do; for whatever reason they decided on us! You did this to us! You did this to me! Suck it up and shut the fuck up!" I have no idea where this angry outburst comes from, but I deliver it in a raspy, accusatory tone, right in his face. No fear or withering wallflower cowering in front of an Alpha of the pack. Just an angry girl, faced with a stupid boy who bruised her heart and is pissing her off by denying his part in it. A powerful frustration-fueled lecture with snarls and throaty growls included. I lock a penetrating gaze on him, pinning him where he stands as though I could impale him with looks alone. It s true though. He can stand making speeches and regretful apologies from now until eternity, but the simple fact is, Colton had a choice, and this is what he chose. He doesn t get to whine like some spoiled pup about it now. He s an Alpha, for God s sake, and he needs to own it. Not act like some overdramatic teen, whose parents are being lame and stopping him from doing something superficial. He stares back at me in utter shock, rendered mute at my outburst, and unsure how to respond. Even his mind-link is silent. I don t think any wolf this far below his station has ever talked to him like that, and he doesn t seem like he knows quite how to respond. If I was anyone else, he probably would have me pinned to the floor by the throat and reminding me who the Alpha is. Instead, he s silently shocked that I even had it in me. I 'arghh at him, and shove him back abruptly, marching past, simmering with this sudden newfound rage, and I know it can only be some sort of delayed reaction to what happened tonight. I m not myself, I don t feel like I m really here, and to be honest, this whole Carmen-Colton-Vampires bullshit and being brought to the home of the people who made my last decade worthless, is all a little too much for me right now. I m angry, seething, bubbling away inside at him, at them, at life, at the goddamn Fates. Most of all, I m angry at myself for being this weak, stupid girl who wasn t good enough to keep, and too useless and vulnerable to save her friends, her family. I lost everything and almost died. Terrified inside, deep down, like a churning pit of foreboding that shadows me, of the monsters I knew only from stories. The ones who jumped out of the fables and threw me out of my bedroom window. Knowing they are out there and close enough to devastate our kind is enough to make me cower for the rest of my life. They had a weapon, a sound that, much like Carmen s, could hurt us and render us unable to turn. That means we re no longer the stronger in this newfound war and we can all be killed. I have bigger things in my head right now than love confessions, and pining assholes trying to mess with my head while arguing with his mate. "I m not going to spend my days whining about this crap, and I need you to just stop, okay. The words you said in the forest were the end of this. There s nothing to say or drag out and talk through." I turn on him aggressively, lifting my palms in a show of 'what now? , meaning, where the hell am I meant to be going in this damned house because I have never been here before, and I m fucking lost. He nods back at a door behind me with very little to say. His expression ashen, temporarily without words, and not tackling my mood in the slightest. To be honest, he looks a little shell-shocked and right now, but I don t really care. I have weeks of pent up heartbreak at this guy s hands and I m done being a pushover. My life, in one night, went from awful to completely rock bottom, end of the line, apocalypse kind of bad. I have bigger headaches than him. My emotions start shredding and unraveling now that I ve let all of that out. Chest hit with a heavy shunt, and suddenly I don t feel so pent up and hostile anymore. Instead, I feel like I might actually cry. From rage and frustration to a sudden need to lie down and sob. Energy burned out from venting, and reality coming back full circle to remind me I ve lost everything. I spin away from him, then stop and shudder involuntarily as the overwhelming wave hits me at full speed and the tidal wave of tears come out of nowhere. I don t even have a chance to try to combat it before it hits full throttle. Breaking and flinching as I lose control and they start to fall. Coughing on the woeful sound that escapes me and smothering my face with both hands to try to catch the waterfall as it pours from my eyes. "Lorey, baby, don t." Colton catches me by the arm, tries to pull me towards him, but I throw him off, putting too much force into shoving him away from me and sending him back about three feet. Startling him with my show of force as he raises his palms to show he won t retaliate. Even breaking down like a feeble femme, there s an internal burning rage that just isn t ready to die. "Don t. I don t need you touching me, consoling me. I just need you to leave me alone. All of you. I was fine on my own before, and I ll be fine on my own again." Not so accurate, but irrational, and hormonal, are not states to be argued with, and all I know is I need to get out of here and run. I need space. From him, from them, from this, my whole muddled head of pain, at knowing from tonight onwards, nothing is going to be the same ever again. I turn and head for the front door impulsively, not caring about anything else but getting solitude, the darkness invading the open space as I reach it, sending an internal shiver of terror down into my stomach. I peer out into the unknown, from a doorway I ve never known and knowing that creatures out there worse than us mean us harm. They could be anywhere, and I have no place to return to now, either. "No!" Colton yanks me back with force and I spin on him tearfully. "I ll leave you alone, but you re not leaving this house. It s dangerous out there for all of us now, and I won t let you go." He pins me with a commanding look and a hostile tone, veiling a sliver of fear for my safety, but I throw it aside and cast off his emotions that are flooding me once more. I open my mouth to bark a refusal, but he hits me with a mental link and that dominant tone that instantly disables me. You are not to leave this packhouse without my say so, and you won t argue! Stop it, now! My head buzzes, both with rage and sheer frustration, as words catch in my throat and almost choke me. I can t get them out, his gift being misused to confine me to his home and stop my need to tell him what I think of his 'commands . Rendered mute because he forbade me to argue and the only words poised are ones that tell him where to go. I instead throw my hands in the air, glaring furiously at him and then sucker punch him in the abs, out of intense frustration. He flinches, half-smiling with a shocked response, and total disbelief that I m being this aggressive and a little apprehensive about how to react. I storm left, heading for the bathroom I just came from. Hating on him for being such a bossy asshole and exerting his powers over me when he has no goddamn right. Colton catches me by the elbow instantly and yanks me to the right instead, heading for the stairs at a fast pace that signals he s in no mode to argue about it. Forced by his strength. Not even letting me choose where I get to be alone and it riles me, that simmering fire in my belly returns in a flash to push all tame aside and my inner demon shows face. I fight him every inch of the way, by tugging, and squirming, and pushing him off, stabbing him with scathing pointed glares, refusing to relent. I pull his hand from my arm, getting madder when he grabs me by the other instead, a tighter, biting grip that is meant to bring me back to heel. I twist it away, but to no avail, as he shunts me from behind, then slides his arms around my body and continues to guide and push me forcefully where he wants me to go. It becomes a juvenile game of slapping, grabbing, shoving, tugging, and he gets me around the waist and lifts me from my feet before I ram an elbow straight in his face, crunching on the bridge of his nose and bruising my bone in the process. "Fuck s sake, Lorey!" he snaps at me, losing his shit completely and stops as we hit the foot of the stairs. Seriously emanating all kinds of rage at my refusal to be controlled and glares at me, hitting me with a full-on furious frown and sneer. He turns me snappily, hauls me towards him by the waist, bends and hoists me over his shoulder like a sack of potatoes. Not playing anymore; his anger radiating hotter than the sun, but it only heightens my own. Carrying me as I squirm and wriggle and kick out, using my nails on his back to make him drop me. He grips me tight and does the worst thing he can do at this moment. He uses his gift again to get me to do as he wants, against my will. Be still. Be quiet. Obey me! I freeze, motionless, voiceless, all without choice and completely furious that he renders me immobile. My internal bubbling pot of 'how the fuck dare you intensifying to volcanic levels in the blink of an eye. Internally seething that twice, in the space of a minute, he s exerted his Alpha tone over me and put me in my place like an obedient little lowlife. My body obeying him, my throat muting, and I honestly don t think I have ever felt this much venom for anyone in my whole life. It almost explodes inside me, with the power to rip down these damned four walls. Like a kettle letting off steam after boiling to excessive popping abilities, and it fills every pore and vein with molten lava, straight from the depths of hell. I loathe him, more than I ever thought I could hate anyone, and despite being bonded and imprinted to this arrogant asshole, I want to rip his goddamn fucking, stupid, dumbass, shitty head off his shoulders and kick it down the stairs like a soccer ball. That internal rage heats me like a volcano from inside out, my blood reaching boiling point, my temper shooting through the roof, and despite being utterly paralyzed and slumped over him as we climb the stairs, my mind and insides churn up a tornado that would scare the Fates. It feels like I emit a solar flare when I boom out via our mental link. I FUCKING DESPISE YOU!! It s a psychic scream, but as we pass two other Santos on the stairs, the very second it erupts from my mind to his, those two males cower and fall to the ground, grabbing their heads and yelping in agony. Colton also crumbles, dropping me clumsily with an ungraceful thud on top of him as we collapse in a heap on the steps. Like a tremor of an earthquake erupting from my soul, every vase, glass, ceramic, and piece of pottery in the near vicinity, explodes instantly, windows blow out all around us and the chandelier of the main hall hanging to the left of the stairway shatters into a thousand tiny specks of self-combusted dust, as though it just exploded. Scattering microscopic glitter into the air that comes to settle on everything around it. It s a second of utter chaos, as though a bomb just went off in the center of the packhouse, and hard brittle objects in every direction break under the strain with a dramatic 'whoosh . People come down like tenpins around us, caving and crumbling while covering their ears, every single Santo in the downstairs hall who just walked in. I can see them from my viewpoint. All gripping their skulls and screwing their eyes shut as it reverberates through and causes them all to collapse where they stand, in a ripple effect. I m the only one not clawing at themselves to keep, what seems to be overwhelming pain, out. "What the f…?" Colton is breathless as he tries to regain composure, sliding his arms away from me quickly and skirts back to give me space, leaving me suddenly free to pull myself together. A hint of fear darting across his normally emotionless face as he flashes a glance at me and then on the carnage and debris all around us. I can sense his panic and confusion, and, for the moment, I can feel he doesn t want to get any closer, that he s wary of what I just did. If that was even me. I m dazed and bruised from being dropped on a hardwood staircase and completely bewildered about what the hell just happened. I feel like there was some sort of implosion around me, yet I m completely unscathed. And now, my internal thoughts, body, and soul are totally calm. All that fire and rage, just gone. "Was that voice hers?" One male on the stairs crawls to his knees and attempts to pull himself up by the bannister, staring at me warily. He, too, looks afraid and keeps his distance, getting further from me as he moves out of range. "You heard her?" Colton spins on him, and I pale as both men nod. Eyes darting to me, then him, and they slide down the steps until they get on their own feet and scale it quickly to get away from me. Shaking legs, rubbing their heads and I can feel all eyes turning my way as others pick themselves up from the floor. The hall looks like Armageddon just rolled through and there s smashed glass, china, and all sorts of carnage on every surface. I know I did it in the headspace that only Colton should hear. No one else can access our bonded link. I didn t say it out loud, and as I move to sit up and gather my wits, I realize I m no longer bound by his command either. I cough, and croak out a shocked reply; weirded out that I can both move and speak. Shouldn t be able to until he undoes what he told me to do. "I didn t do that." I implore him, turning with nervousness, wounded when he moves even further away, mistrusting eyes on me. I can sense his apprehension, and it cuts deep, like he s rejecting me all over again. "What the hell was that?!?!" Juan Santo bursts into the open space of the front door of the packhouse, surrounded by his entourage of men, all dragging on blankets to conceal their nudity and looking utterly feral. All casting an accusatory eye, first at those who have come out into the hallway to see what s going on, dazed and confused, to join those picking themselves out of the mess, but then his eyes scan up to where we are and lock a hateful glare right on me. I can almost taste his disdain for me and the pointed way his eyes flicker to Colton in a 'why is she here? furious unspoken question. "I think that was Alora. I mean, it was Alora." Colton sounds sheepish, and even through all this chaos going off inside me, I can feel he s afraid to come near me. There s genuine confusion and fear inside him and he s keeping his distance by several feet now. Bonded or not, right now, he is scared of me. He doesn t understand what I just did any more than I do. "It couldn t have been. She can t have the power to inflict that kind of pain in the link state. Or break everything as far as the eye can see. No wolf can." A voice in the crowd echoes my way and I m aware of every set of eyes locked on me now and shrink down into a huddled heap of shame. Heat rising on my face as I try to become invisible. I immediately think of Carmen s gift, wondering if maybe it s coincidental, and this was her from somewhere else in the house, going catatonic in her misery, but I know it can t be. She can smash glass only in the near vicinity when she sustains a scream at the highest pitch for long seconds. It hurts our hearing, not our mental link, and she s never demolished everything around her the way I just did. Nor immobilized the entire pack with one pulsating psychic yell. "Alora can." Colton s voice drops in the air like a heavy thud, and the deathly silence, wave of shock, fear, and utter confusion, that meets his response, sends the fear of God right to the pit of my soul.