Chapter 7: The Hallway Hurt

I started digging through my bag after the final bell rings. I was missing my journal and two of my romance books. Maybe I left them in my locker. I was sure Hannah and I picked them up earlier after being tormented. Unlocking my locker, I felt my throat close in. There were papers and some school books but nothing of what I was looking for. 'No, no, no! This is not happening.' My face started to get hot, and my lunch started to come up. Was it possible Hannah had them with her stuff? "Are you looking for something?" a male voice asked. Ugh, Chase again. I felt like he had done enough to torture me today. I did not need him to add insult to injury. "That is none of your business, Chase. Please leave me alone." I snapped at him. His good looks weren't worth this. "No need to be grumpy," he said as if he completely forgot how he treated me this morning. "Look, you have ruined my day already. I am just looking for some of the things you and your friends tried to destroy. So, if you don't mind, go away," I huffed. He held his hands in the air to surrender. "Okay, okay. I just thought you would want these back." He held out my journal and missing books. 'No. no, not happening! Kill me now!' This could not be a worse situation. "You took my books!" I grab the romance books back, but he holds the journal high above his head. "They may have fallen into my lap this morning. Very interesting stuff in here Aria. I didn't peg you as the type." He smirked. I badly wanted to slap that look off his face. I felt violated, disgusted, and embarrassed. "I don't know what you're talking about. Give it back to me, Chase. I am not in the mood for your sh*t." I attempted to reach for it again. He moved it higher and laughed. "I am happy to refresh your memory." He laughed and opened my journal to a random page. People passing by could hear everything. "Good morning, journal. I call you my journal because having a diary at my age seems so childish. I'm getting fed up. I am seventeen, and I still have never had sex." As he read my words with his voice, I could start to feel the bile coming back up in my throat. "Chase, knock it off," I begged. "You're a virgin? That is surprising. I mean, I know you have this innocent look about you, but I figured you would have at least had a long-term boyfriend before—one you would promise eternity with and f*ck at least once," he said. A few people heard this and laughed. "But luckily," he continued, "I have my romance books to teach me a few things. After all, I need to be ready for that special somebody one day." A few laughs echoed around me as a small crowd started to form. Where was Hannah? I needed her right now. "Seriously, Aria, I am shocked you haven't had your first kiss yet. You're cute." He handed me the journal finally, and the crowd slowly started to disperse. "What is wrong with you?" Tears started to form around my eyes. "I'm just messing with you. It's not a big deal. We joke around here," he explained, but all I heard was excuses. "You aren't that funny, actually, so maybe try a different career path." I shot back, trying to hold back my tears. This was not a time to be weak in front of him. He leaned in and started to whisper, "Tell me something, do you always masturbate to your romance novels, or do you ever think of people you know?" My eyes widened. I felt the anger and rage building inside of me. "Go to hell," I responded. He returned that recommendation with a smile that quickly faded. "You know what else I read?" he asked as if it even mattered at this point. "Does it look like I care?" I replied, shoving the books deep into my bag. "In fact, don't you have someone else to bother? I've done nothing to you, and invading my personal space is really messed up. You're how old, yet you think acting like this is funny or even remotely okay." I was not going to take this sitting down. "Aria, don't act like you're the only one in this school who hasn't had sex. This doesn't make you special. Plus, no one will care tomorrow," he responded as if shaking off my feelings was going to help. "Look, I don't care what you say or think at this point." I started to breathe heavily. It was definitely obvious. "Well, yes, you clearly care, but I also read that your parents are divorced. You moved here because of him. Is that true?" he asked. "Why would I lie to my own journal, you dimwit?" I shot back. "He's a piece of sh*t," he responded, looking at his feet and then up at me. His face change was quick and sudden, but I saw it. "What? Who is?" I heavily sighed, trying not to listen to any more proof that he knew my entire life. I was never bringing this journal to school again. "Your father," he responded simply. He almost looked apologetic, but that might have just been me trying to find some humanity. "What are you talking about?" I asked, not fully understanding the turn this conversation was taking. "No man should abandon their family," he replied. "It's not right, and no one deserves that. I hope you don't miss him because he is worthless. Trust me, you don't always need parents around to be something." What he said shook me to my core, catching me off guard. I tried to respond, but no words came out. Hannah came up next to me. "I think that's enough. F*ck off, Chase." She pushed him away. He spun around and walked away but not before turning back once to look at me. Hannah pulled me into a hug since everyone else who served as a witness of my misery was gone. "I cannot believe that just happened." I breathed in and out, trying to collect myself. "How did he get his hands on that stuff?" she asked. I closed my locker. "This morning, during the most embarrassing morning of my life, he must have grabbed them while we were picking up my stuff," I answered. "Sh*t, I'm sorry, girl." Hannah's face suddenly looked scrunchy and sad. She really was a good friend to show such empathy even when this didn't involve her. "Don't worry about it. Thank you for being around so I don't have to deal with this alone. I wish I wasn't such a loser." I felt myself shrinking for a second. I couldn't think this way. I needed to be confident. In less than a year, I would be off to college with new people and experiencing new things. These people didn't matter, except Hannah. "You're not a loser, and for what it's worth, I don't think you should message him anymore. He's a crap bag, and you deserve better. His looks are not worth dealing with all the other stuff." She started to walk with me out of the building. "I don't know. He seems different online." I responded, not sure why I still wanted to talk to him. Maybe he was a different person behind closed doors and the way he acted in public was how he dealt with his life. "But is it worth it? He's not a good guy. I never think he will take it this far." She grabbed my hand. "Aria, Chase sucks. Okay, what he did today was not cool. Is that really someone you want to flirt with online?" she asked. I shrugged. "I need the experience. Otherwise, today is going to haunt me forever, especially now that everyone knows I'm a virgin who has never been kissed." "I just think you should move on and maybe flirt with other guys online or even in person," she said. "Yeah, I'm sure plenty of guys want to be with an inexperienced virgin," I retorted, rolling my eyes. "Actually, yeah, they do, but I mean someone nice who won't pressure you to do anything you don't want to," she responded. I could tell she cared, which was really nice. I hadn't heard from my friends from back home, so someone other than my mom showing feelings toward me was comforting. "Maybe, I don't know. I will think about it tonight, but I don't think I am ready to give up messaging him as my alter ego. After all, the fake girl needs some fun too." We laughed together, and Hannah offered to drive me home.