CHAPTER 18

'Thank you. We'll be there as soon as possible." 'Okay. Goodbye." 'Goodbye." I got up and went to find my sister. She was in her bedroom doing her school assignments. I knocked on the door and let myself in. 'Zen, mom is awake and she wants to see us." 'Fine." I went into my room and took a quick shower and changed into something simple and comfortable. Zenia and I walked to the bus stop and took a bus to the hospital. We walked towards mom's occupied room and found her awake and looking up at the television. 'Mommy!" Zenia let out and ran over to her bed side. I walked over to her side too. 'Mom, you're awake," I spoke, trying my hardest not to cry and break down again. I had done so much of that already; I was losing my energy and my mind. 'Hello babies," she said in a much patched voice. The oxygen mask was off her face and it appeared she was breathing on her own again, for now. 'Mommy, I miss you so much. I'm so sorry you're going through this mom," Zenia said and began crying. I knew watching her cry, I would begin to cry too. 'Shhhh, don't you cry," Mom said to her and Zenia threw her arms around her in a hug. The tears came, I couldn't stop it. I hugged my mom too. 'Mommy, I'm so sorry. I feel like all this is my fault. I've let you down because I didn't have my priorities in order. I'm so sorry mommy that I'm not doing anything to save you," I cried on her arms. 'Baby girl, you need to stop this. Why are you talking like this? This isn't your fault Jassy and you can't carry that burden on yourself. You need to let it go. You've accomplished so much at twenty-four and I'm very proud of you. I don't want to hear you talking like this baby; it's not your fault. It's no one's fault. Let it go," she comforted me with her arms wrapped around my back. Her words made me felt better but it didn't change the fact that she was still dying. Mom didn't want us to pity her and to be shedding tears for her so we looked at the television together and began laughing and talking like we always did when things were easier and happier for us. For the first time since she was admitted to the hospital, I wasn't feeling guilty. Mom began coughing and holding her chest again and gasping. Zenia pushed the nurse's button and in less than a minute, the room was swarming with doctors and nurses. Zenia and I were put outside the room which caused a panic on us. 'Oh my God Jassy, Mommy!" Zenia screamed and cried even more on my chest as she hugged me. I wrapped my arms around her and cried silently. I hated it. I really wished I had enough money to save her, I closed my eyes tightly and prayed to the God I believed in. I took Zenia to a chair close by and allowed her to sit. I sat down next to her. After thirty minutes, Dr. Shannon spotted us and came over. I got up immediately on seeing her. 'How is she?" I asked. 'She's alright but she's no longer breathing on her own again. Her oxygen levels are low so we've placed her back on the tanks," she explained. 'Okay." She placed an arm around my neck and walked me away from Zenia. 'Jasmine, you're the eldest daughter so I should be telling you these things." 'What things?" I asked surprisingly. 'She's dying Jasmine and I know I've said that she has a month for the most, but it could be less than that. It could be any day." The tears streamed down like rain. 'I'm so sorry," Dr. Shannon added then she left. I walked back over to Zenia and together, we went back home. 'I'll miss her Jassy, I'll miss her so much," Zenia said as she threw herself down on the couch when we got into my apartment. 'I'll miss her too." My phone rang again and it was unknown. My heart sank. ‘It might be Dr. Shannon with the terrible news I knew would be coming but I wasn't and will never be prepared for it.' I answered. 'This is Jasmine." What I heard on the other end definitely made my heart stopped beating and the tears came more. Jasmine's POV 'Jasmine, I've missed you so much baby. How are you?" his voice spoke. I froze, hysteria coming over me as I tried to control my tears and emotions. Why was he calling me? What did he want? For my entire life, I had only been involved with one guy and one guy only. And that involvement took place at my old college when I was twenty. Bradley Pittsburg and I dated for a year and a half and when we were about to graduate, he dumped me out of nowhere, without an explanation or a reason. I was so madly in love with him, he was my first everything but he showed himself, broke my heart and treated me like dirt. I always assumed that he was cheating all along, or he desperately wanted to move on with someone else. Whatever the reason was, it still haunted me because I was such a good girlfriend to him. Since the break up, I deserted myself from everyone else especially my friends, thinking that they would eventually walk away as well. That was one of the reasons I had no friends and I didn't trust everyone.