Chapter 2

I didn’t have time to respond because the next thing I heard was a smack. In fact, I heard the loud smacking sound before I felt its effect on my face. Gasping in both pain and shock, I held my cheek, my eyes watering and spilling down my face in one swift movement. “What have you done?” a voice thundered. Though my ears were ringing from the slap, I recognized my father’s angry voice fighting its way to the surface. “You had one job! Just one and you chose to burn down our pack house? Are you trying to embarrass me?” I could still hear the distressed shrieking of the wolves as the chaos went on around us. I kept my eyes on the ground out of respect for him. “It wasn’t me, Father. I swear. I don’t know…” I cried, feeling a banging at the back of my head. “I let you out of the house so you can be more like your sister, you useless pathetic swine,” he went on, cutting me with his words. All I could think was why didn’t he love me? Why did he hate me so much? “It turned out to be a mistake, obviously. My reputation is in the mud now.” “Dad, please,” I cried, my eyes on the ground. Father had told me so many times to never look him in the eye because I wasn’t worthy. I longed to now, to reach out to and touch him so he could see that I was really sorry. But I didn’t, otherwise, he would’ve slapped me again and I was still reeling from the first time. “I promise I’ll do better. Please give me another chance.” It wasn’t the first time I’d taken the fault for one of Alison’s stunts. I was used to it. Trying to explain was a waste of time. Once something went wrong, I was the one who’d done it, regardless of whether it was true or not. “Another chance?” he echoed in disgust. “I don’t think so. You’re to clean this entire garden up. Alone. I don’t care how you do it, you foolish girl. Wash it, mop it, clean it however you like. You are not to leave until this garden is sparkling. Otherwise, I will really kill you this time. Stupid girl.” He swung on his feet and walked away, and all I could see was his boot-clad feet hitting against the tiled stone ground. The tears fell with an alarming intensity, not because I’d been slapped but because once more, my father had proven to me just how much he hated me. “Aww,” Alison cooed from beside me. “Tough love, Arya. Wipe those crocodile tears off your face before I do it for you, you fool. This is what happens when you try to bite the hand that feeds you.” I’d forgotten she was there. Anger filled me at her sheer wickedness. “How could you do that to me, Alison? I’m your sister.” I couldn’t see her face but I felt her recoil at my words. “And you don’t know how much I hate that. I detest you. I wish you’d never been born.” By the time she walked away, I noticed how quiet it was, the only sound was the soft crisping burning of fabric. Tears formed a thick lump in my throat and my knees gave way, pulling me to the ground as I let out a cry. The past twenty-two years of my life had been spent in agony. I couldn’t recall one time when I’d truly been happy. My father and twin sister made life hard for me and from the moment I could form coherent thoughts, I didn’t understand why. They hated me so much. What had I done? I was only a child. I couldn’t remember much of my mother. Father said she’d died a few months after our birth. Sometimes it felt like he blamed me for her death even though Alison and I were twins and it wasn’t plausible that I’d been the one to kill her. Here at the Crest Pack, my father treated me like the shit underneath his boot. No one respected me. I clutched my chest as I wheezed in pain, the weight of my tears almost blinding me. No one cared that my father held the second highest rank in the pack as Beta. Even the Alpha had said he hadn’t known Father had a second daughter. I was ridiculed and laughed at, sometimes even harassed by some of the men. Alison was the decorated child. The one everyone loved and thought was amazing. We looked nothing alike. I had sandy blond hair, a straight thin nose and eyes the color of the ocean. Alison, on the other hand, had jet-black hair, a long nose, gray eyes and thin lips that always curled in disgust when I was near. She was also stick-thin and tall, whereas I had a little flesh on my body and was shorter. My twin sister never failed to call me fat. She said I looked like a stuffed turkey and needed to lose some weight. Because of her, I’d struggled with body dystrophia and had proceeded to starve myself. A fruitless venture, because all it’d done was weaken me and almost landed me in the hospital. Still, I’d tried. To please her, to please them both. Somehow it seemed like everything I did ended up backfiring and causing more problems. Eventually, I’d accepted my fate and came to terms with the fact that they wouldn’t love me no matter what I did. I’d settled for being the black sheep of our family. It’d been a while since Father hit me. When I was locked at home, it was a frequent occurrence. However, in the past four years I’d been out, the beatings came once or twice a month when he was not able to contain his anger. I was aware my self-esteem was below hell. My family had spent so much time convincing me that I was worthless and pathetic that I now believed them. I was worthless and pathetic. I couldn’t stand up for myself or even talk back to Alison. It was pitiable. Swiping underneath my eyes, I got to my feet and began to pack up the silverware and crystal glasses into a carton. Like always, I would break down for a moment and then I would pick myself back up. There was nothing in the future for me except this life. The sooner I accepted that, the better for me. Father said I couldn’t leave until I was finished with cleaning. My bones were tired and my legs ached. I hadn’t gotten any sleep in eighteen hours because of the preparations and all I wanted to do was lie down and drift off. Not for the first time, I contemplated just ending it all. But something kept holding me back. Something strong. It gnawed at the back of my head like a mantra and ate at my subconscious. It told me that there was more to life than this and all I had to do to get there was to stay alive and keep my head up.