Chapter 36

Euniel My feelings are so mixed. I don't know what to think of all this, much less how to react to it. At the same time I'm angry because I've spent my whole life in lies and falsehood. I always thought that my father was my parent. I was certainly sorry to see him so distant and indifferent towards me, but I had never pushed my thoughts, or even had any doubt that it was not he who fathered me. This feeling, of having the impression of having no roots, of being disconnected from one's origins, or even of being lost in the middle of an immense desert without knowing which destination I am going to take, it is what I'm feeling right now. However, in the midst of all this storm of negative emotions I can't help but feel an inexplicable joy deep inside me. It is as if a heavy burden had been lifted from my heart. Yes, this burden that I carried around from childhood to adulthood, which has tormented me all this time. I've always thought of myself as a good-for-nothing, as someone who