CHAPTER 11

Such scenes in the morning happen every day to Brent and me. Monday to Friday. On Saturdays and weekdays, I always make excuses and let Mom go to the city and buy something or take a walk in the plaza or do a project with my classmates. But the truth is that I only hang out with Brent. It's like Brent is my vice, my day can't be complete without us together. What we do is addictive, honestly. Once, I asked myself if I was still in my right mind. However, I did not neglect my studies. It's just that, I was no longer the top one when our adviser announced the students with high marks. Michelle is the top one in our class and I'm only second. It doesn't matter, there's still college. Maybe my not entering our Home Economics had a big impact. A week before our graduation, I just noticed that I hadn't had my monthly visit in days. My chest was very tight when I thought that I might be pregnant. When I looked at Brent's behavior, he smiled at me. I was encouraged because he told me several times that he would be responsible for me if what we did was fruitful. But the doubt still didn't go away from my heart because I was worried that my parents might not accept what happened to me. I know how highly they look up to me. "Do you have a problem? I've been noticing for a while that you don't seem like yourself," Brent asked me when we ate lunch in the canteen. I want to tell her right away about my missed period. But I was shy and hesitated because I was scared. "I'm delayed by one week," I told him when I finally got up the courage. "Where? Is there something you were supposed to go to that was delayed because of me?" he asked me Honestly, I want to hit him with a spoon and fork. I made it difficult for him because I was here and had a hard time confessing to him but he still misunderstood what I said. "I THINK I'm pregnant!" He blinked a few times as if he couldn't believe what I said. Well, what I announced was really shocking. Who wouldn't be surprised? "Ah. But it's still not certain that you're pregnant, right?" he asked me "W-what do you mean?" The tone of his speech made me nervous. "I mean, first we need to make sure if you're really pregnant or not. Some women have delayed menstruation even if they're not pregnant. Just don't think about it, okay?" He tried to cheer me up but not really, eh. I was worried about what might happen. After I ate, I went with him to the library. He accompanied me. And in our class, nothing has changed, he is still the same. When it was time to go home, he put his arm around me to the gate as we used to do every day. Has nothing really changed or did I just not see what I should have seen? As most people say, love is blind. In the evening, we had an early dinner because my mother said she had a walk. I would have liked the dish he prepared but I had no appetite. "Jamie, why are you eating like that? Isn't this sautéed sweet potato tops your favorite?" My mother asked me. "It's still early, Mom. I'll just eat again later. Wait, where are you going?" "Hey, where else does he go at night but to Talia? He's going to watch the Star again," replied Dad. "Leave him alone, Dad. Don't you want to go with Mom?" I asked him. "Is there anything else I can do, you know how your mother is afraid of the dark!" He said angrily. "I know. Go now, I will just do the dishes." In my mind, it's better if they leave first because I want to be alone. Earlier on the way home, the two of us stopped by Brent's house and he took a pregnancy kit inside. "Okay, after you wash up, go to sleep because you have an early class tomorrow." Mom bought it from me. "Yes, Mom," I answered. When I was alone, I quickly put away what we ate and washed up. I went up to the house and took the pregnancy kit from my bag. I read the instructions on the packaging. So, you have to pee and put it in the kit. Wait a few minutes until the red line appears. If there are two lines, it means she is pregnant and if there is only one, she is not. I carefully made my way down our wooden staircase. I was about to enter the bathroom when Kevin suddenly arrived. "Kevin! You're amazing!" "So you're surprised every time you see me? Why is that? Don't you always have a big smile every time I pass by you?" Alas, here it is Kevin again in his incessant recapitulation of the past. I'm getting tired of listening to his lines to be honest. "If what you mean to me is not important, you can leave Kevin. I have something else to do," I told him and turned away from him. Instead of going to the bathroom, I went to the kitchen. But Kevin suddenly grabbed my hand - which was holding the pregnancy kit - and the thing I was holding fell. Kevin quickly picked it up and looked at it. "Pregnancy kit? Who is it for?" He fried me even without oil. I was caught, cornered and nowhere to run. "Kevin, can it be ours first? I'm not sure yet, eh." My voice screamed as I begged Kevin to let us know whatever he found out. "Jamie, how did you do this thing?" He got angry and punched our bathroom door. I read a mixture of bitterness and regret in Kevin's voice but there was nothing I could do. Everything has happened. I have come to a situation that is difficult to change. The least I could do was to take responsibility for my actions. "I can't answer you, Kevin. Can we just talk later? My brain is still a mess," I begged him.