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CAN'T BREAK MECAN'T BREAK ME
By: Webfic

First day

I woke up early to get ready for work. There are not much things to take and so, I only have a backpack with my comfort pajama inside, undies, a framed picture of my family and my copy of the bible. Before leaving, I sit at my desk and write a letter for papa. In it, I’m informing him of this new job, which will keep me away from home for the long term. I also tell him that he will have to take care of himself and perhaps get a job too since I won’t be able to send him money. I put the letter on the living-room table, next to his cans of beer so I’m sure he’ll find it. As a last caring act for him, I also leave on the table the little bit of money that mama had in her closet. That’s the most I can do for papa at this point. I’m thinking of going to see him one last time in his bedroom but I quickly decide against it. I’m not foolish enough to take that risk. He’d be more than capable of touching me inappropriately again and I don’t think I can handle that. Therefore, I leave quietly, knowing that I won’t be back here for a long time. It feels like I’m turning away from my history. I’ve lived here all my life and all of a sudden, I’m forced to go somewhere else...It makes me tear up on my way to the bus station. Going to the Whitlock’s mansion is quite a hassle. I don’t know how mom kept up with it all these years, especially while suffering from cancer. First, I have to take the bus for twenty minutes and then ride in a train for almost two hours. Of course, all of this is manageable. The worst for me is the thirty minutes walk on deserted forest paths to finally reach the mansion. By the time I get there, my legs are numb and I’m drenched in sweat despite the cool morning air. At least I won’t have to commute like this if I live here, that’s one thing to be happy about. Today, I don’t have to introduce myself at the gates. They open as soon as I press on the interphone button and all I have to do is walk in. I also find that Hector, the chief security guard, is waiting for me at the mansion door with the same stoic look from yesterday. I wonder what he’d look like with a smile... “Good morning, Catalina.” “Good morning, Hector.” We get inside together. He tells me that my bedroom is next to the kitchen and that I should head there first and change into my uniform. I didn’t even know I would have one. Hector takes me to the chamber and I come to realize that it will take me some time to get used to all the different hallways in this mansion. There are just too many of them. But, when I get to my bedroom, I find that it looks absolutely lovely. It’s big enough with a large window giving an exquisite view of the back garden. A queen size bed stands by the wall and I have a closet and a desk, as well as a soft carpet. The walls are painted in lavender. I smile in appreciation. My previous bedroom was a lot smaller than this one. “Your clothes are in the closet.” Hector tells me. “After you change, you can get to explore the mansion on your own and start cleaning. Everything you need will be next door, in the kitchen. Also, keep in mind that Master Whitlock wakes up at eight and breakfast must be ready by that time. Is there anything else you would like to know?” “No.Thank you, Hector. But...Where can I find you if I have questions later?” “You can just send me a message.” Hector and I exchange phone numbers and I thank him again. Maybe I can find a friend in him, even though he doesn’t look too sociable. He leaves me alone and I open the closet to check what’s inside. There aren’t plenty of clothes but it’s just enough for me: two sets of pajamas, one dress, two pairs of jeans and a few tops. There is also underwear in one of the drawers and the sight of them makes me blush furiously. The old man thought of everything, huh... Of course, the most important items are my three uniforms of different colors: pink, black and baby blue. The pink one is my favorite so I naturally decide to wear it on my first day. The uniform is the typical maid outfit. It’s a dress with nice collars, buttons on the front and a white apron around the waist. The only thing is I find it a little tight and short...The dress barely reaches mid thighs. I guess they didn’t get my right size but it will have to do. I keep my backpack in the closet and head out to the kitchen. It’s massive. My eyes widen and I feel like I’m in one of those telenovelas I used to watch with mama. It doesn’t look like anyone has cooked here before because everything is clean and sparkly. I take a look at the fridge and find that it’s filled to the brim with food and so are the cupboards. I find a closet with all the cleaning material, just like Hector said. I wear gloves, plug in my headphones and instantly get to work. I’m used to cleaning, I’ve practically done it all my life. My mama made sure to teach me how to take care of a home so I hopefully could do it one day for my own family. I think that dream is not quite achievable now but at least, I can use my skills to pay off my mother’s debt to this family. I start to clean the ground floor and I end up having a lot of fun thanks to the music in my ears. The mansion is huge but it can be manageable with good organization. I dust the old paintings and photographs, broom the floor and mop afterward. At seven, I return to the kitchen to start breakfast. I’m assuming I will have to cook plenty, not only for the old man but for the guards too. Luckily, there is plenty of grocery available. I make a typical Colombian breakfast with scrambled eggs, sautéed rice with beans, sausages and arepas. And coffee too, of course. I was just setting the last dish in the dining room when Mister Whitlock walked in, resting half his weight on a cane in his right hand. I fold my arms in front of me and greet him formally: “Good morning, master Whitlock. Your breakfast is ready.” He doesn’t acknowledge me. I watch him through the corner of my eyes, taking place at the table and picking at his food with a fork. His face is void of any emotion as he says: “Miss Catalina Nunez will be caring enough next time, to keep in mind that I’m old and don’t have good teeth. These types of meals are uncomfortable for me to eat. A chicken porridge like those your mother used to make would be more appreciated.” Despite his complaint, he still puts some scrambled eggs in his mouth and chew. I nod. “Yes. Sorry, master Whitlock. I hope you will still enjoy your meal.” As I walk out of the dining room, he suddenly turns around and yells at the top of his lungs: “Nice ass in that uniform, by the way!” I don’t have to see myself to know that my face has turned violently red due to rage. I swallow it down and leave quickly. I never met a more disgusting man in my life and believe me, there has been plenty. There is another dining room by the kitchen and it’s reserved to us, the staff. When I get there, I find that no less than ten young men in guard uniforms, including Hector, occupy the large table. They are very loud and cheery. I wasn’t expecting to find them in here and I gape at them with surprise. They also stare at me in a similar way. I note that three large dogs are sitting by the table too and they look ready to attack. “Uhm...” “Don’t worry!” One of the young men chuckles. “These fellas won’t attack unless we ask them to.” “Oh.” Indeed, the dogs remain in the same position even though their dark, beady eyes are still on me. I clear my throat and try to catch as many eyes as possible. “Well...Hello to all of you. My name is Catalina, I’m the new maid.” “Nice to meet you!” They all reply in unison. Their good mood is instantly back. I smile as they all excitedly speak at the same time to give me their names. I forget them as soon as they come to my ears. Something tells me that these guys haven’t been around a lot of women, which would explain their current child like behavior. “Let me get y’all some food.” I say and they cheer again. Some of them help me get the dishes from the kitchen and put them on their dining table. The most eager to please is a youngster that probably just turned eighteen...Still very young compared to the others. His name is Ricardo. During our trips from the kitchen to the dining room, I get to learn a lot about him, like the fact that he was working for the Whitlock family since he was sixteen and that he’d seen a lot of gruesome stuff in this job. I don’t know if he’s just exaggerating to impress me or if he’s actually telling the truth. The table is barely set that they all start to dig in, eating like starved men, which they were, maybe. I get sausages for the dogs too and they lick my fingers affectionately. “You’re Mrs. Nunez’s daughter?” One of the men asks me with his mouth full. “Yes, I am.” “Your mama was great. Sorry for your loss.” They present their condolences and I smile to thank them. I end up joining the table and eating my first meal of the day among these new friends who keep filling my plate with sausages and arepas. For one quick second, I feel bad for Master Whitlock, eating alone next door. But then, I remember what an asshole he is and realize that someone like him doesn’t deserve anything else. After breakfast, some of the guards help me clean the dishes in the kitchen and tell me to come to them if I need anything. Ricardo blushes deeply when he waves me goodbye, being the last one to leave. I find myself alone again. It’s during the afternoon that my downfall truly begins. I was already starting to get used to my new life in the mansion when master Whitlock called for me to meet him in the living room. I go in there, not really knowing what to expect and find three strangers sitting with him on the leather cushions. I guess immediately who they are: the Whitlock sons. One is a five years old child with a full head of thick curls and blue eyes. The other is a boy of maybe twenty years old, looking just as icy as his father. And lastly... It takes me a while to get over that last one: the oldest son. I guess he must be in his mid twenties and is by far one of the most handsome men I ever got to lay my eyes on. He is tall and strong, with deep hazel eyes and a sharp jawline. His dark hair has been put in a neat style, pairing adequately with his impressive eyebrows. He looks like he’s been sculpted out of stones. Our eyes lock and it becomes almost impossible to look at anything else. “My sons, I introduce" to you Catalina.” I hear the breathy voice of master Whitlock. “As I already told you, Miss Nunez, they are coming to stay here with me.” I nod, still staring at the middle son. I could have sworn that he was an angel but he just had to open his mouth to prove to me that he was in fact the complete opposite. He was the devil in person, sent to torture me. His lips stretch in a vile grin, similar to his father’s and he asks: “So, that’s the little slut you got for us, daddy?” The faint smile I had on is swiftly wiped out of my face. My mouth falls open while the little five years old chuckle and all four sets of eyes fall on me. The humiliation is making me want to bury myself alive but more than anything, I want to know...What is exactly my purpose here? Have I just been brought to be the maid or is there something darker that I should have known before throwing myself in the lion’s den?

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