Chapter 10

I tried to hold my composure as I was walking through town, but it was so hard to do that. As soon as I knew I was away from the main part of town, the tears started streaking my face. I tried not to draw attention to it, but there wasn’t much I could do to stop it. I felt like everything was falling apart. Everyone I knew either hated me or they were lying to me. I thought about going home and that made me feel even worse. I wasn’t sure I could even handle lasting a year here. At first I thought it was just a year. I could do that. But now, it seemed like this year was going to take forever and I didn’t know how I was going to do it. I honestly do believe Wendy when she says that she’s my friend. Why wouldn’t she be? She’s done nothing but prove to me that she was my friend and she stood up for me when she didn’t have to. She gave me her old clothes that were practically new to me. They were beautiful. But that doesn’t change the fact that she was hiding something. Her and the twins were in on something and I couldn’t help but wonder if she was helping them get closer to me, knowing that I didn’t want them to. She took me to her place, without telling me that the twins lived next door, and they watched us the whole time I was there. They were talking really seriously about that Dean Calvert guy and I didn’t know what the hell that was about. They wouldn’t tell me. I feel like there’s some secret society around here and I’m not a part of it. I’m just here to watch while everyone else does their thing and I’m just supposed to watch from the sidelines. By the time I reached the edge of my driveway, my cheeks were stained with my tears and my face was hot and red from crying. I walked up to the house and Marilyn’s car was still in front of the house and I walked up the stairs and inside the front door. She was just walking downstairs in her work uniform but she stopped at the bottom when she saw my face. She looked at the bruises on my face where the concealer had been washed away by my tears and because I had been wiping my face on the way home. She was blocking my way upstairs and she slowly walked up to me. I looked up and stared her in the eye when I saw the sneer come across her face. She wasn’t going to give me any sort of comfort at all. She wasn’t going to give me anything that a mother should. I don’t know why I expected her to. “What the hell is all this then? Where the hell did you get these clothes from?” She asked, pulling on the black jacket. I tried to ignore her and walk past her towards the stairs, but she grabbed me by the arm and threw me against the wall. “You are everything that I said you are, aren’t you? Using your pathetic looks to trade favors with guys at school.” She spat at me. “What the hell are you talking about?” I asked. “Making yourself look so pathetic so guys will feel sorry for you. Is that it? Are you slutting yourself around school to get guys' attention?” She yelled at me. She was getting even closer to me, pointing her finger in my face and suddenly I felt something just snap inside of me. Something that I had never felt before. Something that I didn’t even know I was capable of doing. I slapped her hand away from me and I pushed her away so hard that she hit the wall on the other side of the entrance. She looked back at me with shock and anger in her eyes, but I didn’t care. I wasn’t having it this time. “You can go to fucking hell Marilyn. I am not slutting myself around to get anything from guys. I’m not like you.” I yelled. And I saw her face go red and she pushed herself off of the wall. “What the fuck is that meant to mean?” She yelled. “Who’s my father? Do you even fucking know? He knocked you up and then disappeared. You decided to have me anyway but you’ve hated me ever since. You’re the last person that should be calling anyone a slut.” I yelled. “You ungrateful little bitch. I am your mother. Who the hell do you think you are talking to me like that?” She yelled. “My mother? Is that meant to be some sort of joke? Mother’s aren’t pathetic spiteful bastards like you. They don’t steal money from their children. Mother’s don’t accuse their daughters of slutting around school just to be popular with boys. Mother’s don’t ignore their daughters when they are told that their husband is molesting them. Mother’s don’t make their children work for food while they're still at school. You aren’t my fucking mother. My father is nothing but a sperm donor. And you are nothing more than a fucking egg donor. You wouldn’t know how to be a mother if your life fucking depended on it.” I yelled, not knowing where any of this was coming from. I was shocked that I was even able to say any of this to her without breaking down in a panic attack. This was some sort of courage that I had never experienced before. I had never been game enough to say anything against my mother. I was always too scared to. But I guess, this wasn’t one of those days. I’d had enough. I was getting bullied at school. I was getting bullied at home. I couldn’t take it. I knew that I wasn’t going to last the year here. There’s no way. Marilyn stood there staring at me in disbelief for a long time before she finally raised her hand and she slapped me across the face. “Feel better now?” I asked, calmly. Not even flinching when she hit me. It’s actually not something that surprised me. I was surprised that she didn’t hit me earlier. “I want you out of this house.” She said. “You’re throwing me out? For what? Telling you the truth?” I asked. “I want you gone. I never want to see you again.” Marilyn yelled, pointing to the door. “If I go then so do the monthly checks.” I yelled back at her. Suddenly Jack came out of the living room and he was standing beside me. “What is going on here? Did you just hit her?” Jack asked, putting his arm over my shoulders. “She doesn’t deserve to have anything that we give her.” Marilyn yelled. “You don’t give me anything.” I screamed back. “Alright. Why don’t we all calm down.” Jack said as I shrugged away from him. “I want her gone.” Marilyn said through gritted teeth. I looked at Marilyn and Ava was going crazy in my head. It actually felt like she could kill someone right now. I stood there staring at Marilyn and a weird sound came out. Almost like a growl, from my throat. Did I really just growl at her? Where the hell did that come from? “Ella. Why don’t you go upstairs to your room and get some rest.” Jack said, holding my two hands in his. I looked at him in disgust and I rolled my eyes before I pulled my hands back away from him and I walked up the stairs and into my bedroom where I slammed the door. I paced around my room for a while. Just like Ava was doing in my head. We were both mad. Pissed off more than we ever had been and I didn’t know what was happening to me. I had never felt like this before. I had never lost control like that. I started taking deep breaths and trying to calm myself down. It took a long time before I was able to calm down, but when I heard Marilyn’s car drive away I walked over to the door and locked it. I knew without a doubt that Jack would try to talk to me. And I was not willing to be near him right now. I was a little afraid of what I would do or say. I didn’t want to talk to anyone. Ava was even trying to talk to me, but I was ignoring her. I knew that she was just going to tell me that we could last the year here before we take off. But I knew that it was almost an impossible task. I couldn’t last a whole year living in this house with her. I grabbed a notebook out of my bag and I opened it to a specific page that I had labeled; WEIRD HAPPENINGS. My newest entry was - I growled at Marilyn. I heard the heavy footsteps on the stairs and down the hallway before they stopped outside my bedroom. “Ella. Open the door.” He said. “Go away Jack.” I snapped. “I want to talk to you.” He said. “And I want to shoot you. What’s it gonna be?” I asked. “Why don’t you just go back downstairs and drink yourself into a coma again?” I asked. I could tell that he was hesitating, but he made the right choice by walking away and back downstairs. I didn’t even bother with my homework that night. I didn’t leave my room for anything. I changed into my pajamas without having a shower. Figuring that I would have one in the morning, while Jack was either passed out or occupied with fighting with Marilyn. I got under the covers of my bed and all the springs on my bed creaked as I tried to get comfortable. Which was really hard considering most of the springs were broken and were jabbing me in the back. The last time I looked at the clock that night was 10pm and I must have passed out some time after that. I was woken up in the middle of the night by something strange outside. I heard something outside my window that didn’t sound right. So I looked at the clock and it was 3am. So I got up and I walked over and opened the window. Suddenly Tristan jumped through my window from the tree that was directly in front of my window and he moved at a speed that I didn’t know was possible and he placed his hand over my mouth while his other arm was wrapped around my waist. Scaring me half to death when he did it. Nathan jumped through the window seconds after Tristan and he closed the window behind him.