Chapter 8 MY BABY IS GONE

"How's your day?" Her grandmother asked. She smiled," It's okay. I got a lot of tasks to do for my boss." She is peeling an orange for her grandmother. "Have you talked to your mother?" Her grandmother asked again.  She shook her head and said, "No." She didn't look at her grandmother. She doesn't want to say her face hurt. When it comes to her mom, she cannot deny that she isn't ready to talk to her yet. She isn't even ready to talk about her.  She doesn't know when but that's all she can feel not now. "You look tired Ann. Would you like to go home and then you can send Carla to be with me here tonight?" Her grandmother said with concern to her. She is supposed to be the one worrying and not her but ever since her grandmother has been loving and caring. "After all the doctor said I can go out tomorrow." The old woman continued. She suddenly remembered the night five years ago. "Gra--andmother," Mary Ann called her grandmother in a broken voice. Her body trembles and her knees become weak. The night that she gave her femininity to a stranger made her pregnant. She doesn't know what to think of as she stares at the small device.  It has two lines. According to the instruction, two lines mean positive. Positive means pregnant. She is just 19. How can she be pregnant? "Yes, dear?" Her grandmother answered and she sobbed on her chest like she always does whenever she is in a difficult situation. She told her grandmother all about what happened the night that she and Cathy attended Marla's party.  She wasn't having a period for more than a month so she decided to get a pregnancy test and to her fear, it turned out positive. Her grandmother tried to understand her the best that she could. They left their place and moved to San Isidro. Her grandmother convinced her mommy that they need to move to another place. Her mom doesn't know about her situation and the reason why they are moving out. Even though her mom was wondering why they needed to move far away from the place where she grew up. No word or no clue was given to her mom.  Up to the time that Mary Ann gave birth to a baby girl. She named her Annie. The baby is a premature baby. Her grandmother still didn't want to let her mother know that she is pregnant even after she already gave birth to baby Annie. Grandmother has always been awake since she gave birth to Annie. Her baby has a sensitive condition. The baby needed hyper care since she is a premature baby and Mary Ann doesn't have any experience of taking care of a child at a very young age. Her grandmother is the one who always takes care of the baby because she needed to go back to studying again after giving birth. When she got pregnant, she also stopped. Her grandmother did everything that she should have done. Her baby is premature so she needed to stay in the incubator for almost five months. She just dropped by at the hospital when she got back to school. She goes straight to the hospital to visit her daughter and after five months of going in there, finally, her baby can be discharged. The doctor told her that Annie's condition is getting better. She is healthy and she can play compared during her first days. The only problem they have is, they need to avoid baby Annie from crying a lot or being overjoyed. Baby Annie is a blue baby. (A blue baby syndrome is an extremely rare disorder and apart from due to heart defects, has a decent prognosis with fewer health penalties. If the disease remains unattended it may lead to complications and even death.) Her baby's condition is difficult and it is made more difficult because of their situation. Her grandmother is old and she primarily takes care of her baby. Every time her baby cries, Mary Ann also cries. She is so afraid of what might happen to her. Too many emotions make her baby change her color. She could be paled and turned in violet if they fail to attend to her as quickly as possible. Everything that they have gone through is a secret from her mother. The old woman wanted to keep it a secret because she's afraid that her mom might scold Mary Ann. Until one day, Mary came home from school and when she entered the house she was surprised to see her mother sitting on the sofa in the living room. Her grandmother was sitting in front of her mother. Her mom's face is scrunched up and she could tell she is angry. She could feel that as she followed her with her eyes. She went straight to her grandma to kiss her cheek and then, she stared into her Grandma's eyes. Her grandmother didn't say a word but just nodded at her. She could feel the heavy emotions in the living room. She turned to her mommy without saying a word. She doesn't know what to say. She doesn't know if she is already aware of baby Annie. She is just an inch near her and about to kiss her on her cheek when suddenly, she felt something hard hit her face. She fell on the side of the table in the middle of the sofas. Her mother slapped her so hard that it made her feel very dizzy. "What are you doing?" Her grandmother suddenly stood up to help Mary Ann but she stumbled. Her head hit the corner of the glass table. It breaks into pieces. The blood came out of Grandma's head.  They all cried in shock. Mary Ann didn't notice that her baby Annie was sleeping in her crib and because of the sudden loud noise from their scream her daughter was startled and woke up. She cried.  Mary Ann didn't know who to attend first. Her baby is crying while her grandmother is soaking in blood. She saw her mother running to her grandmother so despite the dizziness she quickly ran to her baby's crib and carried her daughter. "Shh...Shhh... Mommy's here." She carried her and tried to calm her down from crying but baby Annie's cry was getting harder and harder. Mary Ann could see her daughter's face color change. "Annie, please calm down. Here's mommy." She said in between her tears," Rock-a-bye, baby, on the treetop When the wind blows, the cradle will rock When the bough breaks, the cradle will fall And into my arms comes baby and all" Mary Ann sings between her tears. She is shaking. She doesn't know what to do. "Grandma," she said in a broken voice. No one almost heard her. Her baby's cry is gone. Baby Annie stopped crying. Mary Ann panics again, "Grandma my daughter! My baby!"She shouted," Baby Ann-ie," tears flowed down her cheeks. She cried so hard and she couldn't see clearly anymore. Her mom walked near her and took the baby from Mary Anne. "Give her to me." She was trying to save the baby's life.  She performed first aid as best as she could but she wasn't able to save her. Baby Annie no longer breathes. The baby was gone. Her grandmother was leaning on the side of the sofa holding her head that was still bleeding. I saw my Grandmother leaning on the side of a sofa, holding her head still bleeding. The old woman is crying. She felt helpless. They are in that situation when Auntie Carla comes inside the house. The woman puts down all the things she bought. "What happened here?" She shouted," Are you okay?" Auntie Carla asked her grandmother who was still crying. "Please call an ambulance, baby Annie needs help." The old woman said in the middle of the pain she is experiencing. Auntie Carla just came back from the supermarket but she didn't pay any attention to the stuff she brought. She is so surprised by the situation that she saw when she arrived back home. She asked for help and called the ambulance. She didn't look at her mom. She doesn't have the courage. She could feel that she was staring at her.  Mary Ann just bent down while sitting on the floor locked inside her arms with her daughter. Her tears are unstoppable. She could feel her body frozen. She was in that position when the ambulance finally arrived. They also do what her mother did earlier, trying to revive her daughter's life. As expected, they have declared her little one dead. Her daughter already gave up and left her in this world. Baby Annie finally gave up on battling her life with her and her grandmother in just a blink of an eye. She didn't expect that her child would leave her as early as this.