Chapter 3 Unraveling Secrets

The arrival at the apartment had a significantly tense atmosphere. For some time Kai was walking back and forth in the living room with an uncomfortable look on his face, while I sat on the couch with the shoe which he made me hold. That deadly calm was between us and we communicated insofar as it was possible without speaking. Finally, he stopped and looked at me, and his eyes were piercing through me. “We have to settle this, once and for all”, patronized he with a gentle intensity, the deep timbre of his tones. “This arrangement, our marriage- it’s not as straightforward as that You do not know things, I cannot tell and this is important for you to grasp: I am not the one who you should be seeing as the antagonist here. I scowled, not quite ready to accept that there was no explanation for her behavior, or what she was exactly. An impulse took over and without thinking further I asked her. Fury drained the color off Kai’s face, and for a second, I expected him to leave completely. But then he sighed and sat down across from me, looking markedly uncomfortable. "Vanessa, there are parts of my life that are. . . complicated. The deal with your father was just one piece of a much larger puzzle. I can't go into details, but know this: I am a man of my word so when I said that I would cater for your mum’s bills then that’s exactly what I do. He was trying to reassure me and the words flew straight out of his mouth, further confusing me. “Then why did you consent to this marriage, if you are so engrossed in something else, why immerse yourself in my family problems?” He stared straight into my eyes, He scrupulously surveyed the face in front of him. One time you asked me why and I said it was for a husband because I needed to keep a promise and your father had the solution and it was purely a business decision all the way. The tone that he used, utterly cold, I almost felt annoyed at him and heard this in my head. “That’s it, I am a mere object to be used in business negotiation, am I?” Kai looked at me tenderly and moved closer to me; his lips formed the words ‘I understand’. ‘No, you’re not a pawn. You’re… more than that. But you have to trust me. There’s a lot at stake, I can’t afford any mistakes. I wanted to ask questions, to force him out of this cloak-and-dagger lifestyle, but I could tell I would not get any cooperation out of him. Not now, at least. Thus, the man seeing my discomfort, proceeded without waiting for my response through a simple nod of my head. “Okay. But you have to tell me the truth as well and no more telling me a half-truth or giving me vagaries. We have to be in sync if we are to make our arrangements work. ” He seemed to ponder this a bit, and then finally nodded his head. “Both of you are right,” I said though I wanted to add, that there are some things that still I have to withhold and I can’t tell you guys yet, please do you accept that? I drew a brief breath, then simply said yes in profound understanding. "I can try. " There was a trace of a smile, which contorted his face for but a second before it was gone again. ‘‘I have to accept that it’s the best I can do. ’’ The following few days were rather surreally uneventful – the household was exceedingly cautious and on edge. It became sort of a pattern for Kai to be out and about with vague business to attend to and me attempting to embrace this new life. I cooked, cleaned and at times went out into that area so as to familiarize myself with the new environment that I found myself in. However, heading these processes, many questions began to appear in my mind, and none of them were answered, and all of them were constantly torturing me. One time I remember we were eating dinner and in the midst of silence Kai decided to talk. Speaking with your mum’s docs today, everything progressing the right way with the treatment but more tests will have to be conducted. I felt a sense of relief course through my entire body together with a slight twinge of guilt. “Thank you,” I murmured. “I can’t explain to you how much this means to me. ” He looked at me for what seemed like a long time before responding saying ‘I nodded, Allowing my face to remain a mask’. It is a standard response used by persons who feel that they have received much from others and now it is time for them to give back. After dinner, Kai went to his study, and I was left alone in the living room. I sat for one unknown amount of time thinking before my curiosity overpowered me I tiptoed, my hand knocked gently on the door of the study room, which was closed at that time. Negotiations were not successful, so without waiting for a response I slowly pushed the door and looked inside. Kai was struck in front of the desk with his legs on the chair and eyes glued to the laptop. Documents and papers were strewn all over the table and he appeared to be mid-thought. For a moment I thought of letting him be, but then I gently coughed to attract his attention. He looked up, and more than startled he closed the laptop immediately. “Vanessa,” he said barely concealing his anger. “What do you intend to do here?” “I just. . . I wanted to know if you needed something,” I said, fumbling for words and uncomfortable as if I had interrupted him. He unbent with these words but his eyes are still shifty. “I’m perfectly alright… It was just work-related business. ” Thus I looked around the room and saw the piles of untouched documents and polished computer facilities. They had moved what looked more like a facility for commanding than a home office. “You look so occupied,” I managed to make it better with ‘bu’ but I could sense that he was more occupied than usual. “Even to this day, I always receive this question from different people; ‘What does exactly do?’. ” Kai hesitated, then sighed. “I work in investments, which is… complex. ” Unfortunately, he answered with carelessness, which only made me interested in the issue even more, but I am not an idiot, so I did not insist. “Okay then, if you ever in need of assistance in anything, feel free to ask me,” I said to him as I also smiled at him. He smiled back at me but it didn’t seem genuine, the light did not return to his eyes. “Thank you very much, I will bear that in mind.” I got out of the study, deeper in the dark than when I went in. Kai Ace was a man of many secrets and to me, that was something I was just getting to discover how far it indeed went. At the same time, there was a voice inside of me that was fascinated, pulled toward this mysterious man. Who was he? But what is the person trying to conceal? That night as I was putting to sleep I pondered over many things that has happened to us after we got married. The secret of our marriage right from the beginning, the mysterious conversations we had, the message dissections that were much more than what they appeared to be, all these made me feel that there was more to it. And yet, despite the clouds that still hung over both our heads and those questions that remained unanswered in some way, the feeling of a bond between us was developing. Something that personally went past the business relationship we had in our agreement. But what did it mean? But to where? Such were my thoughts as I closed my eyes to go to sleep not knowing that the answers are already out there waiting for me in ways beyond my reckoning. As it turns out, the truth was a lot more nuanced and nasty than I had ever believed it could be.